Nine ways to calm an angry woman, written by a man

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Women are really fun in general. Sometimes, more than men and many might not agree but their ideas of fun can put yours to shame, depending on their mood. Talking about mood, that four letter word is a very dangerous thing in a woman’s world and something a man should tread lightly with. Mood may ruin a woman’s day but that woman with the bad mood can scar you for good. And if you think it’s not rocket science when it comes to handling a woman, well, it’s tougher than that! So, here, take notes, these ways to calm an angry woman will increase your chances of handling her better. We can just wish you all the luck! Scroll away!

 

#1 Write her something nice

Not many men would give in to this activity but it might actually work. But again, it all depends on the woman who is probably upset because of something even the Lord doesn’t know about. Also, it depends if she’s into reading and writing, maybe then you have a chance to make her get back to normal. If not, she might just burn that piece of paper and you with it.  Be scared, because you won’t rise up from the ashes and she’ll be looking at you burning to the ground while she sips her wine.

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#2 Ask her what’s going to calm her down

Okay, alright, don’t do that. If you do, you’ll be digging your own grave. Never ask a woman what’s going to calm her down. If she knew she wouldn’t need you. So you can either try something different (in which you will probably fail) or you can leave her be till she finds her cool. But you don’t know how many days, weeks, months that may last.

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#3 Compliment her in a way that won’t make her angry

From the long list of ways to calm an angry woman, complimenting her is the safest option. We’re pretty sure it is. But only if you do it right. If it backfires, guess who’s going to be in dire straits. It’s going to be you, dear friend. She won’t give two sh*ts about the compliment you gave, but what she understood. That’s why, tread lightly.

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#4 Ice creams can be of little help!

Every woman on the planet loves ice cream! All you have to do is get the correct flavour and the right amount. If it’s less, you’re in trouble, if it’s too much, you’re the reason she’s fat and that headache you have is because she threw the empty bowl on you. Take a few hits, it’s alright, maybe you deserve it. I’m just saying.

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#5 Cook for her… two minute noodles is not an option

The only reasons you’ve been in the kitchen is to get water, heat food or to find some in the middle of the night. Other than that, sex, well, if you’re that lucky. But cooking is something you never thought of doing until you decided to cook food for the angry woman in your life. And who are you kidding; the only thing about cooking you know is how it’s spelt. The two minute noodles don’t count so you can do yourself and the lovely lady a favour by just ordering her favourite food and be done with it. Play it safe when you can!

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#6 Ask her friends to help you out

Now, to calm an angry woman you may think asking her friends for a little help shouldn’t be a problem. We men are a little naïve, there, her friends might somehow help you out but your angry lady will be updated by her friends with EVERY. SINGLE. DETAIL. If you succeeded in cheering her up and she gets to know about the help you took, you are back to square one. And this time, it gets tougher, just like hunger games.

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#7 Take her shopping

A woman’s favourite thing to do on this planet can very easily be shopping and if there’s a sale, the mall is her paradise! You know it pretty well, yourself, because you have been there! Behind them lifting all those bags and it shouldn’t make you feel sad for not hitting the gym. It’s no less than that!  And if she asks, about the dress, remember, be honest. Not too honest, just honest. Answer with yes or no and you’ll just be fine. Unless, you plan to f*ck it up, be my guest!

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#8 Sweet talk

Every woman is different in her own way, similarly, some might be into sweet talking and some well, you try till the time you get them into the zone or when they just tell you to stop or she’ll hit you. And you know she means it with that look on her face. But again, try; give into it without making a fool of yourself and you will succeed. She’ll probably understand and just to shut you up she’ll give in too.

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#9 Sex is the answer

Actually, men want it to be the answer and why not? It vanishes most of your problems like Hitler did with the jews? (Excuse the bad joke) but you get it. But expecting that she’ll want to have sex in that mood, man, you’re more stupid than she thinks you are. You can’t just jump right in and ask her, “let’s do it, it’ll make you feel better!” Boy, she’s a woman, who are you kidding? She’s smarter than you. You’ve got to work to earn and that implies everywhere. Make her feel fine, dine and after that, if she wants it, you’ll get it.

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It can be pretty hard to find ways to calm an angry woman but there’s one that will always work; all you have to do it talk and listen to her, without judging or giving your views (unless she asks you). If she can put up with your drama, you need to reciprocate and you’re sorted. Women are lovely creatures who can be a little hard to understand but they’re fun to be around.

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